SIDEWAYS SENTENCES

I really didn’t say everything I said. (Yogi Berra)

I hurt all over more than any place else.

That’s the first time that’s ever happened again.

So, do you live around here often? (Steven Wright)

Are you always like this when you get this way?

You can observe a lot by watching. (Yogi Berra)

Indecision may or may not be my problem.

Include me out! (Samuel Goldwyn)

Oh well…half of one, six dozen of the other. (Joe Garagiola)

I don’t dress this way to make them look at me. They look at me ‘cause I dress this way. (Willie Chambers of the Chambers Brothers)

I went for a walk last night and my girlfriend asked me how long I was going to be gone. I said, “The whole time.” (Steven Wright)

That doesn’t make even more sense.

Don’t just do something, stand there!

I feel much more like I do now than when I first got here.

You may be wrong but you’re not far from it.

I’d give my right arm to be ambidextrous. (Pigeye Powers)

What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money. (Henny Youngman)

I can’t see you so don’t pretend to be there.

Without Geography, you’re nowhere. (Jimmy Buffet)

(Sign seen outside a club) Members and nonmembers only!

(Answering the phone) Is this the party to whom I’m speaking? (Lily Tomlin)

If the left side of the brain controls the right side of the body, then only left-handed people are in their right mind.

You look like I need a drink. (“Naked”)

Put me out of your misery.

I didn’t do it and I’ll never do it again.

I am a deeply superficial person. (Andy Warhol)

If you need anything, I’ll call you.

I never liked you and I always will.

Why don’t you watch where I’m going!

I didn’t come in here and I sure as hell ain’t leavin’!

That’s what I always say sometimes.

I thought you’d never hear from me!

Come back when you can’t stay longer.

I used to work at a fire hydrant factory. You couldn’t park anywhere near the place. (Steven Wright)

It’s been nice trying to talk to you.

Glad you had a chance to meet me.

Keep in touch with yourself.

Everybody’s entitled to my opinion.

There must be a harder way to do this.

Thank you very little. (Tom Newbill)

Don’t ever change…I want to forget you just the way you are.

If you don’t get everything you want, think of the things that you

don’t get that you don’t want.

Nostalgia isn’t what it used to be.

I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left.

It’s okay to be redundant, as long as you don’t repeat yourself. (Pigeye Powers)

Funny, I don’t remember being absent minded.

Honk if you love peace and quiet.

I have gone to get myself. If I return before I get back, hold me there. It is very important I see myself before I get confused.

The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep. (W.C. Fields)

All generalizations are false. (R.H.Grenier)

I get up at 6 A.M. no matter what time it is. (Yogi Berra)

Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you wanted, but getting what you have, which once you have got it, you may be smart enough to see is what you would have wanted had you known. (Garrison Keillor)

There are two kinds of people, those who finish what they start and so on.